To move freely forward, you have to close the doors to your past in time. I did exactly that: buried my husband, sold everything valuable to pay off the debts, moved to the countryside, rented a place, and got a job as an emergency doctor. I thought I would settle in, get myself together, and gradually forget all the horrors. I was wrong, how foolish. The past never planned to let me go, and it turned out to be much closer—and much scarier—than I could have imagined. I became a bargaining chip in a big game. In a survival game.