The Deadly Act. How to Survive Loss, Help the Grieving, and Change Your Attitude Toward Death

Is it normal not to cry at a funeral? How to stop blaming yourself for the death of a loved one? Where to start a conversation about death—and why trying to “get through everything alone” often makes things worse? Where can you turn if there’s no person nearby with whom you can talk about it? Maria Kokova is a psychologist, scholar of religion studies, and researcher in the field of Death Studies; she works with the team of evidence-based psychologists “Nesi suda” and at the psychological counseling center of the National Research University Higher School of Economics (HSE). Losing a loved one is experienced in different ways: some withdraw into themselves, while others outwardly remain calm and hardly change their usual life. The book explains why reactions to loss can be so different, how long grief usually lasts, and how to support yourself—or another person—during this period. Different types of loss are discussed: the death of a loved one or a severely ill relative, perinatal loss, the death of a pet, the death of a stranger, and other situations. It also gathers practical information on how funerals are organized and how inheritance works, plus interesting facts about what happens to the body after death and what burial methods exist.