The Condemned Woman's Last Wish

"Since that monstrous neighbor—half crocodile, half hippopotamus, only by an outrageous misunderstanding called a dog of the Rottweiler breed—tore my handbag to pieces with its terrifying teeth, and then died in convulsions, after it had figured out the canister with the strongest nerve-paralyzing poison… I have finally hated dogs.
Of course, they say a dog is man’s best friend, but as everyone knows, a friend is known in trouble. And it was all those troubles that came from dogs’ kind. So I didn’t count dogs as my friends, and I could only watch the wonderful dog show “Me and My Dog” on the NTV channel for no more than one second—until the first bark and the first appearance on screen of that hairy, fang-baring face.

However, judging by the latest events, dogs were causing trouble not only to those who clearly didn’t like them. My neighbor (not the one who kept the half-crocodile, half-hippopotamus creature, but the other one who lived in the cottage to the right of mine) nearly landed in a mental hospital because of his dog.

And that, despite the fact that he had iron nerves, and anyone who looked at his square face with wide cheekbones and massive overhanging brows—which any Neanderthal would envy—would find it strange that anything could possibly worry this man."