“If you don’t sign the contract, I’ll kill you. Choose how you want to die,” came the stern order. “I’ll give you any death you wish.” “Drop me into a black hole!” I cried with burning eyes and pressed my hands tenderly to my chest. “What?” he was stunned. “I’ll be falling into a black hole for an endless time, and even be able to catch the heat death of the Universe—if…” “Sign that damned contract!” he snarled, losing patience. “With blood! Right now!” “With blood?” I grimaced. “With blood.” “Technically, urine is blood filtered through the kidneys,” I said, eyeing the parchment. “This is the last time I’m telling you: you can’t sign a contract with urine!” He hissed through his teeth. “There are other options. Food is processed by bile, which is basically bilirubin synthesized from blood. So I can piss on that contract and…” “Shut up. Just shut up.”