How to Catch a Cat

The neighbor is a small white kitten—furious, turning into a clump of aggressive energy.

Ugh, I’d calm her down! Any way… My sick imagination came up with a lot, a whole lot of ways.

Did she know where my palm usually is when she screams, rages, and pounds on the wall, ordering the music off and calling me a little brat? And why “little,” by the way? Does she have such an insult for me? Well, it doesn’t bother me. But, judging by everything, it bothers her. She got so worked up when I started calling her “auntie” in retaliation—and since then I never denied myself the pleasure.

It’s funny, isn’t it?

I tell her: “Auntie!”

And she answers: “Snotty brat!”

And she hits the wall with an iron object—clang!

Aaahh… bliss…