If Not for You, Neither Would I. About Love Stronger Than Death

5 hrs. 46 min.

Language Russian

Author Vera Tikhonova

Narrator Vera Tikhonova

Description

A bright, heartfelt book about loss and finding: losing a loved one and discovering new meanings that, day by day, help you live on. The author, journalist and human-rights activist Vera Tikhonova, shares her own story of surviving grief. After her husband died, she began publishing notes on social media about love and closeness, joy and pain. In them, she wrote about her relationship with her husband, about how they lived through fears and doubts together, learned to hear each other, and valued every day spent side by side. The texts began to spread online and touched many people—not only those who had lost loved ones, but also those struck by a love story that proved stronger than death. It was exactly these sincere, touching notes that became the foundation for the book.

“For a person experiencing the loss of a loved one, nothing is more important than having the opportunity to talk about them. To remember the good, the bitter, the different—and to affirm through that their presence: he was, he changed our life, he will always be in our hearts. Not everyone is able to find words and intonation right away, and Vera Tikhonova’s book, in this sense, can become a true guide—on the path from love to pain and back.” — Natalya Rodikova, editor-in-chief of the magazine “Domashniy ochag”

“Here is a book that every person who has experienced love should have written. Experienced—in both senses: met the one and only love of a lifetime, spent days, nights, months and years with the beloved person, and then lost them. This book is about how love changes a person, reveals new and wonderful qualities in them. And also it’s about the fact that love doesn’t disappear with the death of the beloved person—but you need a special talent not to let go even after they’ve left this life. And then the story of loss becomes a story of eternal presence, of the gift of grateful memory that prolongs the departed person’s stay here on earth, near us.” — Lyudmila Ulitskaya, writer

“In autumn 2020, journalist and human-rights activist Vera Tikhonova lost her husband Mikhail—a professional photographer, image editor, teacher. His death was sudden, and to pull herself out of the pit of despair, Vera began publishing notes on social media in which she recalled the most touching, joyful, and frightening moments of her and Mikhail’s family life. These notes formed the basis of the book ‘If Not for You, Then Not for Me.’ It is no coincidence that it was published by the ‘Yest Smysl’ publishing house, specializing in socially significant literature. On the one hand, before us is an incisive, very personal story. On the other, in Russia there is still no accessible system of psychological support for those who are trying right now to survive the death of a mother, brother, wife or friend. And Vera Tikhonova’s book literally cries out that at such moments a person must not remain alone with their grief.” — Maria Smirnova, correspondent for “RBK Style”