Fear of Life and How to Be Yourself

The fear of life arises in us automatically, most likely at the moment we leave the womb — that is, at the moment of physical birth. Innocent, unsuspecting, we suddenly come face to face with what we will later call experience, feelings, sensations, emotions, and so on. Our consciousness is plunged from the deep sleep of the womb into the seething world of violent and chaotic movement, pain, pleasure, noise, blinding lights, and all the other drama that accompanies our birth. Fear as a result is inevitable… John Sherman (1942) spent most of his life believing he was trapped in this heavy, confusing, and possibly meaningless existence. In the autumn of 1994, he entered a world of spiritual inspirations and attainments, remarkable experiences of enlightenment, and vivid glimpses of non-dual understanding. Over the following year and a half he read everything he could find relating to liberation: sutras, shastras, upanishads, teachings, stories of teachers and gurus, poetry, philosophy, metaphysical hypotheses and other writings from every tradition and religion. He was nourished by these beautiful ideas and intoxicated by their promises. He practised every practice, and could enter a state of samadhi at will. During this time, he wrote that he could literally "hear the stones silently singing arias of Being." He finally understood that he needed to find just one single thing that would help resolve once and for all the question of whether it was possible to live without fear and a sense of worthlessness.