Lecture: "Why Grow Up?"

When you deceive yourself or feel that you’re being pulled into a strange game, it’s not uncommon. So how do you get out of this vicious circle? What behavior patterns and ways of perceiving do people who live fully use? In the world, there are no random events. In everything you do—in your manner, your handwriting, your clothing style—you express your wholeness. Yet this supposed randomness gives you a chance to dodge responsibility. There is also no justice in the world. Justice is only a convenient way to shift responsibility onto others—whether it’s other people, God, your boss, or relatives. If someone treats you unfairly, it means you don’t bear responsibility for it and you can move on without thinking about it. In your zone of mastery, there is no place for learning—only mistakes give you the chance to grow. Any «I know» is a limitation; it leaves no room for the new. Mistakes, on the other hand, provide huge opportunities and benefits: freedom, responsibility, the cost and the risk—those are the main coordinates of adult life.

Based on my extensive experience, I developed this model and gladly share it. Alexander Roitman is a clinical psychologist and psychotherapist, an author and teacher since 1983, who developed the group training method «Roitman’s Marathon» and the practical seminar «Roitman’s Algorithm».